As I was thinking about what to write today, this contrast came to mind. Am I in the former camp, or the latter? When I enter a situation, do people want to leave or work with me? Proverbs talks about this in 25:24:
“Better to live on a corner of the roof than share a house with a quarrelsome wife.” (NIV)
Ouch. Now, I’m not saying I’m a wife (:p), but the truth behind this verse applies to me, too. When I’m snappy and biting I’m sure people want to take off for the hills. But wait, there’s more in 16:27:
“A worthless man digs up evil, While his words are like a scorching fire.” (NASB)
Whoa, a scorching fire*, eh? I’ve experienced that from others and myself. Sometimes you spew words and it feels like pure venom. It’s one of those “I-wish-I-could-rewind-but-I-can’t-and-now-I-just-destroyed-you” things. When someone does it to me, I just want to shrink and disappear. Not a fun feeling.
When we talk to people, regardless of our mood, do we make them wish they didn’t exist? Do we devastate others and then later excuse it because of our mood? Contrast that to how our words should be (Proverbs 25:11**):
“A word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in pictures of silver.”
Yes, that may be poetry, but the truth is that a correct word choice is beautiful. Proper words are awe-inspiring regardless of the message. It’s presentation is superb, and people want more or it. Proverbs 16:24 states:
“Gracious words are a honeycomb, sweet to the soul and healing to the bones.” (NIV)
Are we full of crushing and biting remarks? Do we mock others***? Or are our words soothing and full of grace? When people mess up, are they afraid to come to us for fear of our wrath? Do they fear our sarcastic tear-downs?
As Christians, we are called to take the high road. To forgive, to talk with grace. As a chronic failure in this area, I know I need forgiveness and grace. But we can grow together and look towards the day when our words will destroy no more.
*Read James chapter 3 to learn more about how dangerous words can be. Yeah, they can be very dangerous.
**If you couldn’t tell yet, Proverbs is great for learning about how to live. It’s full of tips and wisdom. On a side note, too bad its author (Solomon) didn’t follow some of his own advice…
***Coincidentally, I was listening to “Something You Said” by Insufficient Funds on Pandora. Among other things, it talk about a man who verbally abused his wife and she goes and commits suicide… cheerful stuff.
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