Thankful for the Weird Things

            I really struggled with how I should go about this one. I didn’t want this post to be the typical “I’m thankful for God, my family, and my friends” thing everyone would expect*. Not that anything is wrong with that… but I want something unique! Here are several weird and unusual things I’m thankful for. If you asked me why I'm thankful for some of these, I probably wouldn’t be able to tell you:

1) When I’m driving and the window fogs up suddenly. I don’t know why, but I’ve always found that funny.

2) When a friend of mine I haven’t seen in a couple years completely surprises me by visiting and we sing “Puttin’ on the Ritz” in my car. That happened this morning. Side note: the music video for that song is really weird. 

3) When I have a pile of clean clothes I have to put up in my closet or dresser. I don’t know why, but I actually enjoy putting away clothes. My mom must’ve brainwashed me or something.

4) Those moments when you tell a joke and your friends PRETEND it isn’t funny… but you know they are dying of laughter inside; they just don’t want to show it.

5) When a limb of mine falls asleep. I love that feeling.

6) When I’m at church and I have a family member to lay my head on so I can pretend I’m listening to the sermon.

7) When I say something really, really obvious and/or stupid. I realize it, and look at my friend. My friend pauses…. knowing he or she can nail me with the classic “DUH, genius” or “really, you just realized that?” line. And he or she lets it slide. I’m always thankful for those moments. I hate “duh”s. They make me feel like an idiot. I appreciate their tolerance for my dumb-ness.

            There are tons and tons of little things like these in my life that I’m thankful for. They just spice everything up! Spend some time and think of all the odd little things you are thankful for. It’s a lot of fun! This post has been a blast to write. Or, and here's one more:

8) When I hit "publish" when I'm done writing a post. Knowing that maybe I can make someone smile, cry, or do something in between. Knowing that there are some people in the world who actually care about my thoughts enough to waste three minutes of their life reading them. Thank you.

*I am very, extremely thankful for God. He is everything to me. I’m thankful for my family because they are the only 5 people on this planet who have been with me through everything. And I love my friends. They’ve given me so many memories. I’m so glad they put up with me!

Just a Thought

            Right now I am sick. This morning I woke up with a horribly scratchy throat, a voice that sounds like a bass guitar, a Niagara Falls nose (don’t spend too much time thinking about that), and a cough to wake the dead. It’s not very much fun. I wasn’t meant to live life like this. 

            But as I’ve gone on with my day… I’ve gotten used to it. It’s not abnormal anymore, and I don’t think twice before unwrapping a Hall’s or grabbing a tissue. It’s just me and my life.

            I know in the back of my mind what my body is going though is not normal. I shouldn’t be like this. But what I know in my mind doesn’t change the reality that I am sick and have to adjust accordingly.

            I look at the world and realize it’s the same way. Our world is sick. The symptoms are hunger, crime, disease, death, and pain in general. But we’ve gotten used to it, really. A hundred people slaughtered? We yawn. 50 people dead of a disease outbreak? We ask, “Is that it?”

            You get the point. 

            It’s so important for us to be able to look at our world and realize THIS IS NOT HOW THINGS SHOULD BE. Our world did not start like this, and this sickness will pass one day. The horrific things we witness are symptoms of an underlying cause: a cursed world.

            One day Jesus will come back and reign. Our world will become new again, and so will the people in it. 

            In the day to day grind, it’s hard to maintain perspective. Being able to step outside of it all and hold on to truths like this is very important. If I didn’t know there was hope for this world, I would literally go insane because everyone is suffering for no reason.

            But we are not. There will come a day when everything is going to change. 

You Will Be Known by Your Fruit

           I’ve been thinking of the fruits of the Spirit recently. I remember as a Sunday school child how I would proudly raise my hand when asked if I knew all of them. I would stand up and invariably miss one. And that was it. I wouldn't think about them after that.

            But the fruits of the spirit aren’t just a church-ism. They are real. Paul writes:

            “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control; against such there is no law” (Galatians 5:22-23, ESV).

             I looked at those and realized that, as a Christian, the Holy Spirit is in me. How should people be able to tell? By what emanates from me. Am I loving? Joyful? Peaceful? Patient? Kind? Good? Faithful? Gentle? Self-controlled?

             When you give your life to God, He starts molding you into the person you need to be. This process lasts until you die. Now, certain factors affect how quickly you are shaped, but it begins as soon as you enter God’s Kingdom.

             The Holy Spirit is given to comfort and guide you. If you are living in loving obedience to God, these qualities will shine in everything you do.

             Someone will wrong you. Your response? You will lovingly forgive them.

             Someone will grate at you. Your response? You will treat them kindly.

             People will betray and hurt you. Your response? You will be a faithful friend to them; you won’t treat them how they treated you.

             You are given a responsibility. Your response? You joyfully step into your role and demonstrate self-control.

             You see, when God takes over your life you can’t help but change. How you see others and respond to situations will change. These “fruits” (i.e. qualities) will show in your godly outlook on life and your willingness to serve.

             As always, I’m going to finish by asking you questions. Most likely you are a Christian. Are these qualities evident in how you treat others? When life throws you a sucker punch, do you respond with these traits?

             No one is perfect, but God is here to help us. Be the person you need to be.

Annoyed

            So I’m reading a book about being content. And I’m annoyed. Because whenever I read these types of books I get kicked in the booty. Hard. I don’t like that.

            I like to believe that everything is fine in my own little world and I am living exactly how I should. Until God shows me I’m not… and then I’m annoyed because I know I should change. That’s annoying and really inconvenient. 

            Did I tell you I’m annoyed right now?

            Basically, the author is saying that we need to be satisfied with what we have. But that is so… un-American. You mean I’m actually supposed to be happy with where I am in life? Say it ain't so.

            He also said that if we live in America (as I do), then most likely we have something called “more than enough”. He doesn’t want his readers to feel guilty about this, but just know that you shouldn’t be complaining if you fit in this category. 

            Also, if you are in this category, you need to use this position to give more of what you have to others. Whaaaaa? I don’t like that part. Money? Give it. Time? Give it. Possessions? Give it.

            This is why I’m annoyed. I know he’s right, but that doesn’t mean I have to like it. He gave me a test to show the condition of my heart… and the results aren’t good.

            Because I’m annoyed, I think you should be too. Do you have more than you need? If so, you are in the category of “more than enough”, just like me. If you are in this category, think about how you can use what God’s given you for things bigger than yourself. You’ve been blessed, now spread the blessings to others!

I Respectfully Disagree

            What do you do when you disagree with someone? Are there ways to disagree? Are there "do"s and "don’t"s with arguing?

            Haha, you bet there is. Here are some things I’ve found helpful when I’ve argued with friends and family:

1. Realize that nothing is wrong with arguing itself. Jesus did it, and you can bet your life that you will argue too. It’s what is said and thought during arguments that makes arguing right or wrong.
2. Ban the words “never” and “always” from your vocabulary. They are extremely incendiary. They hurt like you wouldn’t believe, too.
3. Smile and joke while arguing. Lighten the mood if possible.
4. Agree with the other person whenever possible. Let them know you are on their side.
5. Be honest, but phrase things nicely as well. “You shouldn’t do stupid things all the time, and I’m being honest” isn't beneficially honest. “You probably should spend some more time thinking before you decide to do things, to be honest” is. It’s much softer. It’s wordier, but that’s alright.
6. Keep the goal of the argument always in mind. The goal of your argument wasn’t, most likely, to get in as many shots as possible in. It was to improve life; it was to make things better. Always stay focused on that.
7. Most likely, the other person isn’t going to do an about-face on the issue during the argument. We are just too prideful for that. Keep that in mind. But you can bet that that person is going to be thinking about what you said afterwards. Make sure to phrase things wisely, so when they reflect over what you said later they don’t get angry, but contemplative. “Huh, maybe you are right” might go through their head.

            I’m sure I could think of more, but this is good enough. Remember that arguing isn’t wrong; the results of an argument are supposed to improve the lives of both parties involved. 

That Day

            As I’ve gotten older, I’ve realized more and more just how powerful words are. As a result, I’ve written many posts about what words can do. You might be sick of reading about the capabilities of palabras.

            Suck it up, buttercup, cuz this is another post about words.

            Have you noticed how some people change the atmosphere of a room as soon as they walk in? They come in and everyone is either like, "Awesome!” or “Oh boy… brace yourselves”. There is a chance this reaction has to deal with the person’s disposition.

            What about you? When you walk into a situation, are people like, “Yay! Things just got better” or are they saying, “Oh great, here so-and-so is”?

            The answer most likely lies in how you talk to people. That may seem like a “duh” statement, but that doesn’t change the fact that it is true. Do you bring energy and positivity to other people? Or do you bring just the perfect balance of Scrooge and the Grinch?

            If the answer is the latter, there is still hope for you. Just look around and say something nice to someone. Blow their socks off. Make their day. Once you’ve done that, you’ll find that you like being nice to people. And you won’t stop.

            It’ll get to the point where people will want to walk up to you because they know you have something great to say to them. Won’t that be the day?

Let Em Know

            Think through situations involving many people. School, work, teams, home, etc. There are those people who get the praise when things go correctly and the blame when they don’t. These people are in the front. They're the face of the operation, and they get all the recognition. All the focus is on them.

            But I’ve been thinking about that. They don’t actually determine whether or not the entire unit is successful. Oh, they are important in providing direction and executing in-the-moment leadership, but it’s far from a one-man-show. There are other people involved.

             You sometimes see these other people, but you don’t give them a second thought. They are the behind-the-scenes workers. They do the moving and organizing. They do the renovating. They do the hard work, and they don’t demand attention.

             Without these people, life doesn’t get done. There would be no cameramen to record the pretty politicians. There would be no builders to build the mansions shown on MTV.

             These people are amazingly talented and hard-working, and don’t get half the credit they deserve. Do you know anyone that fits this description? Let them know you notice their contribution, and you are thankful for everything they do.

              They still won’t get the attention they deserve, but they’ll know they matter. They’ll know you care.

Do You Like You?

            I am what one would call a people pleaser. I don’t like the thought of ANYONE disliking me. How does this affect how I live? The positive results are that I'm very understanding when it comes to people making mistakes and I try to do everything I can to be encouraging to my everyone.

            The negative results? I don’t always speak my mind when I should and I often inconvenience myself because I tangle myself up trying to help others.

            Just like with any type of person, there are good and bad things to people pleasers. I just listed a couple of both.

            But what I want to focus on is the self-destructive potential people pleasers can have. I can’t think of a better example of this than the woman in Colbie Caillat’s song “Try” (the first two paragraphs are the second verse, the third is the chorus):

Get your shopping on,

At the mall,

Max your credit cards

You don't have to choose,

Buy it all

So they like you. Do they like you?

Wait a second,

Why should you care, what they think of you

When you're all alone, by yourself

Do you like you? Do you like you?

You don't have to try so hard

You don't have to give it all away

You just have to get up, get up, get up, get up

You don't have to change a single thing

            What happens is that we think our worth is tied up in others accepting us. If they don’t accept us, we aren’t worth anything. We feel we matter when others like us.

            But what stuck out to me is the second part of the second paragraph. “When you’re all alone, by yourself/Do you like you? Do you like you?”

            If you are a people pleaser, really think about that. Ultimately, it doesn’t matter if people dislike or like you if you don’t like yourself. You’ll be running on a treadmill that’s going too fast. You’ll get worried about others when the person you should be thinking about for once is you.

            You don’t exist to please others, though you should try to when you can. You exist to serve God by doing the right thing. Don’t compromise yourself so you can be liked by someone who doesn’t have your best interests at heart.

            Do you like you? That’s not a selfish question. If the answer’s not “yes”, your life will be a draining grind, day in, day out.

I'll Tell You What I Want...

            A very, very common complaint I hear from the ladies side is that guys our age (high school and college) are… jerks. Or maybe they aren’t jerks, they’re just shallow and immature. Or maybe they aren’t shallow and immature… yeah, they’re shallow and immature.

            One question I’ve heard is “what should I look for in a guy?” The culture’s answer is looks, humor, and more looks. Now, those things aren’t bad, but if there isn’t character beneath those things, the attractiveness will fade away pretty quickly. So will the relationship.

            When I've been asked this question, I usually answer with some variation of the list of questions below. These are great indicators of a guy’s character (i.e. quality). Now, are all these questions applicable in every guy’s situation? No. But they are generally reliable:

1) How does he treat his mom? How he treats his mom is how he’s going to treat you. Does he look out for her, love her, honor her, and help her?

2) How does he treat his dad? This is how he will treat authority in his life. Does he listen to him, respect him, and obey him?

3a) How is he when he is in a bad mood?  This goes for EVERYONE, actually. We all have bad days when we are in rotten moods. But one of the marks of mature people is that they don’t feel the need to make sure everyone around them is also in a terrible mood. They don’t try to bring you down just because they are down.

3b) How is he when things don’t go his way? Newsflash: not everything is going to go how you want it to. How he handles life and people while going through adversity is a huge indicator of character.

4) How does he spend his free time? Now, everyone loves a little mindless entertainment in front of the television or computer. But one thing I’d like to tell this generation is that there is a world outside your electronic device! Does he spend an adequate amount of his free time doing something useful? This shows productivity.

5a) How does he serve? The mark of a man is that he puts others before himself. Boys are selfish. Men are not. Boys are arrogant. Men are confident. There is a difference, and only one allows for a guy to serve as he should.

5b) How does he treat those who are culturally “lesser” than him*? Examples of these people are younger siblings, friends, subordinate coworkers, children, elders, strangers, those who aren’t as talented as he is in whatever relevant area, etc. Does he treat them with respect? Or does he walk all over them?

            There are more things I can think of**, but this is enough to think about. Unfortunately, many people don’t really put that much thought into who they get into a relationship with. “You’re cute, athletic, and funny. Let’s get together” is about as deep as some go. That lasts until one person actually learns more about the other.

            The relationship ends and scars form. Rinse, repeat.

            Ladies, when you can, ask these questions about the guy you are interested in. God made us attractive for a reason, but if you are basing your relationship off physical attraction and not an attractive character, odds are you will be disappointed and hurt. That’s not very fun, is it?

*This one (5b) may seem out of place, but it's true. Does he take the time to acknowledge those he doesn't have to? Does he give people around him the time of day?

**Yes, I didn't include the "is he a Christian?" question. The reason why is that is a whole post by itself.

Super Average

            Sometimes I get stuck in what I call tunnel vision. I wake up, live a normal day, go to sleep. Wake up, repeat. Day in, day out. Week in, week out. Month in, month out.

            Am I doing any good? Am I making something of myself? Does my life matter?

            I’m somewhat of a self-critical guy, so I often say, “Uh, no. At least, it doesn’t look like it.” I’m not changing the world. School is… school. My friends go through tough times and I can’t help them as much as I’d like to. Customers come to my workplace (Arby’s) unhappy and leave unhappy and I can’t do anything about it.

            Tunnel vision stinks. What is the meaning of the day-to-day grind? Why am I here?

            Recently during a normal day at work we were slammed by an unexpected rush. Both drive-thru and lobby were jammed with customers. I was busy taking orders from the drive-thru, making drinks, and making shakes. If my coworker manning the register was gone, I also had to take money, assemble the orders, and hand out food.

            In short, I was very busy and a little stressed.

            In the middle of this 45 minute period, a woman came to the speaker crying. Everyone with a drive-thru headset could hear her sobbing. We all paused, wondering if we were hearing correctly.

            No matter, we had to keep moving. Order in, order out, life must go on. I quickly forget her after I send in her order*.

            Then she gets to the window. My coworker was gone, so I took her money. Her face was red and she was clearly in some type of pain. She kept apologizing and I reassured her that she was fine. I handed her credit card back and she broke out crying again.

            I asked her if everything was fine, and she just shook her head as she cried. I paused. I had my manager right in back of me, uh, encouraging me to keep the drive-thru time down. Her food was ready; he said she needed to go.

            I asked her if I could pray for her. She nodded and said, “Please pray for me.” So I prayed for her right then and there.

            Now, it was admittedly a clumsy prayer. I didn’t know what to pray for exactly. I didn’t know if it should be an upbeat prayer, or one that was more solemn. Simply, I didn’t know what to say.

            So there I was in a drive-thru in the midst of a jammed dinner rush praying for a crying stranger for 15 seconds with an unhappy manager breathing down my back. It was surreal.

            I handed her her food and she left. I continued with the orders and everything else. I knew I’d probably never see her again. I don’t know what she is going through. I don’t know if my prayer helped her any.

            Why did I share this? Just for encouragement. I don’t know how much of an impact I have. Sometimes I don’t know what my life will amount to. I’m just a high school kid with a fast food job. I’m pretty average right now.

            But knowing that God can still use me is inspiring. He put me in the right place at the right time for someone. I won’t know if what I did had any effect, but the fact that I can still do something in my pretty normal situation is encouraging.

            What about you? Is the daily grind getting you down? Are you wondering what impact you are having? Just know that God has you right where He wants you, and that there will be opportunities to help others. Keep your eyes open and stay positive. If a friend is feeling down, be their bright spot. If a sibling, spouse, or child isn’t having the best day, let them know you are there for them.

            You might be average like me, but you can be super average.

*A roasted turkey, ranch, and bacon wrap. It tells me something that I remembered that.

Lord or Savior?

            I accept Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior.

            Oh really?

            I’ve been thinking about that phrase. As a seasoned church kid, I say it a lot. He’s my Lord and Savior. It rolls off the tongue like a rock off a cliff.

            Okay, bad simile. You get my point.

            As Christians, we like the “Savior” part. We are messed up people and Jesus rescues us. That’s the stuff stories are made out of.

            But then we get to the “Lord” part… and the romance fades. Jesus only saves us once, but this “Lord” stuff isn’t a one time event. It’s until we die.

            Ugh.

            The problem with “Lord” is that it means He can tell us what to do. We don’t like being told what to do. If He is Lord, that means we should obey Him. Obedience is so… not 21st century.

            I have an idea! Let’s pretend He’s not Lord and He’s just our Savior! That means all we have to do is thank Him occasionally (say, once a week on a Sunday), and we’re golden! We can live how we want.

            Unfortunately, that’s the route many take. If He’s only your Savior, you only have to thank Him. If He’s also your Lord, you also have to live for Him.

            Who is He to you?

Lord and Savior

            I was thinking about my faith recently. I had just finished whining about something minor in my life. I had just finished worrying about a test. I had just finished being in a bad mood about something or another.

            I symbolically took my faith in my hands and looked at it. What in the world is the use of my relationship with Jesus if I don’t TRUST Him?

            I can answer my own rhetorical question. My faith isn’t worth very much. Jesus didn’t become Lord of my life to have me worry about what He controls.

            I guess the whole point of this post is for you and me to evaluate our relationship with God. Do we trust Him to do what He says He’ll do? So maybe life is falling in around you. Your friends are driving you crazy and your car decided to break down. That’s when you realize how much your faith means to you.

            Let Him do His thing. He’ll work everything out, just relax and fall in His arms. Jesus has taken care of many before us, and will take care of many after us. He’s done this “Lord and Savior” thing before, you know.